All for Fun and Fun for all :)

These are hilarious texts, especially the last one I posted that was so generously brought to us my textfromlastnight.com. I swear I can never get enough of these. Sometimes I read these to feel better about myself and get some dignity and other times I simply read these to get a really good laugh. There is not one time when I check out this website that my mouth does not drop because I am shocked about a text someone wrote. For example, the one I read was that a mom told her kid she would buy the weed for them if she could go with them for the weekend. Nuts! I tell ya. Such nonsense but it’s the nonsense where I find humor and hope you do too J

1.       “I was driving around baked, window down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before I remembered why I left my house.”

2.       “Hungover. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.”

3.       “Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back into your mouth?

4.       “He used his phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.”

5.       “the bouncer watched the girl drop her ID, saw me pick it up and say OMG SHE LOOKS LIKE ME, and then let me use it to get into the bar.”

6.       “‘Let’s watch the sunrise’ turned into ‘let’s have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning.”

7.       “My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she’ll buy the weed.”

8.       “I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.”

9.       “Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I am NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I’d like to chronicle that ongoing success. I’m going to post pictures of me at 0 WEEKS once a week.”

10.   “The security guard told you that room was off limits and you just looked at him and said, “Its ok I have a beard.”

11.   “I remember you telling me to brush my teeth, take a shower, go get back in bed w/ her and just ‘do what I was born to do’ and as soon as I was done yacking I did just that. You saved my birthday.

12.   “booty call hours are between 1:30 -3:00AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. Please try again.

13.   “my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for Sunday brunch next week. You in?”

14.   “Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny’s while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate a TBell.”